In March 2012, I drove my husband to the airport to say
goodbye. He was leaving to Alaska where he was being sent on orders from the US
Army for a permanent change of duty station. We had been at Fort Lewis, WA for
9 years. Though he had been deployed 3 times from that duty station, but he had
always come back and our family had stayed there. I cried as I drove him to the
airport thinking “How can I do this alone?” We had 4 children ranging from ages
9 years down to 3 months old. We had tried to leave together as a family, but
had been delayed in our processing and paperwork with the military and so our
family had not been approved to travel with my husband. That night as I prayed
and cried to Heavenly Father for the strength to face the unknown. I was led to
the scripture found in Deuteronomy 1:21. It reads: “…The Lord God of thy
fathers hath said unto thee; fear not, neither be discouraged.” As I searched
the scriptures further I turned to Joshua 1:5: So I will be with thee; I will
not fail thee nor forsake thee.” Verse 9: Be strong and be of good courage,
be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed, for the Lord thy God is with thee
whithersoever thou goest.” I felt the Lord was speaking directly to me. Telling
me that though I didn’t know the future or how thing would turn out, I did know
that has was aware of me and that he would be with me. Two days later when my
Husband signed into his new unit he was told that he would be deploying the
next month. This would mark the 4th deployment during his career,
but it was only for 6 months this time and not to a dangerous area. I felt a
bit of relief knowing that we would be staying home where we had the support of
close family, friends, and church members, instead of moving to an unknown area
and being left alone while he deployed.
The children finished up the school year and I put our house on the market to sell. It was a lot of stress dealing with constant showings and keeping the house show quality clean with 4 young children to care for. One night I was feeling particularly worn out and prayed to Heavenly Father for strength. The next day I received a knock at the door. My Relief Society President stood there with flowers and chocolates. She said “I had a dream about you last night. In the dream you were holding a long list of things you had to do. At the bottom of that list it said I am lonely. Then you snatched the list up and said you weren’t suppose to see that, that is only for me.” She came in and visited for a while. When she left, she hadn’t solved any of my problems, or made my burdens any less, but what she had done is let me know that Heavenly Father heard my prayer and that he knew the feelings in my heart. As time went on I would see family after family in my ward receive orders to change duty stations and everything would work out perfectly and they would all leave together as a family. It was hard not to feel discouraged by it. Our house was also not selling and I was weary from having to up keep, fix up and clean it constantly. I would say Heavenly Father “PLEASE…I can’t do this much longer.” Then he would say: “not yet.” Then he would bouy me up and help me to keep going.
One summer day, we volunteered to watch a puppy for a friend for a few hours one day. I walked with the children and the puppy to a local park and we played there for a couple of hours. When it was time to walk back home, I loaded the youngest two in the double stroller and the dog was resistant to come because she was hot and tired. I picked her up and put her on my 3 year old son’s lap. He held her happily. As we were heading up a big hill the dog suddenly jumped off my son’s lap and landed too close to the front wheel and hurt her leg. She yelped and limped away. I was so worried that the puppy’s leg had been badly injured. I scooped her up and put her back on my son’s lap. My oldest son said “Mom, I know what we should do…we should say a prayer for Heavenly Father to heal the puppy’s leg.” I said “that is a great idea!” He prayed for the puppy and as soon as we reached the top of the hill the puppy jumped down and was just fine. My oldest son smiled and said “Heavenly Father healed the dog! Now we need to say a prayer to thank him.” I said “that is a great idea let’s do that!” As we finished the prayer and rounded the corner to go home my oldest son said “Mom Heavenly Father really can do anything!” I said “yes he can…he can do all things.” Here was my 9 year old son demonstrating such great faith. Where was my faith that our lives were being properly cared for by that same Father that “could do all things”?
In September, our orders and paperwork were finally approved to travel. Things started falling into place almost faster than I was prepared for. We had tickets to fly to Alaska the last day in September and though our house did not sell we were able to find good renters. About 10 days after arriving to Alaska, my Husband returned from his deployment, our household goods arrived the next morning and he was home to help unpack and get settled in. As I look back I am so grateful for how things worked out. Sometimes we think that if things don’t work out the way we want, that we are doing something wrong, that maybe the Lord doesn’t love as much as one of his other children. In this case I learned that it is all about timing. He has a plan for each of us. He knows our needs. He hears and answers our prayers. We need to have faith and trust that he ever mindful of us and our needs. We also need to remain faithful to him to be worthy to receive the blessings he has in store for us as we pass through the trials that are put before us. I am grateful for my trials and for the things I learn from them. I am thankful for the Lord’s timing.
The children finished up the school year and I put our house on the market to sell. It was a lot of stress dealing with constant showings and keeping the house show quality clean with 4 young children to care for. One night I was feeling particularly worn out and prayed to Heavenly Father for strength. The next day I received a knock at the door. My Relief Society President stood there with flowers and chocolates. She said “I had a dream about you last night. In the dream you were holding a long list of things you had to do. At the bottom of that list it said I am lonely. Then you snatched the list up and said you weren’t suppose to see that, that is only for me.” She came in and visited for a while. When she left, she hadn’t solved any of my problems, or made my burdens any less, but what she had done is let me know that Heavenly Father heard my prayer and that he knew the feelings in my heart. As time went on I would see family after family in my ward receive orders to change duty stations and everything would work out perfectly and they would all leave together as a family. It was hard not to feel discouraged by it. Our house was also not selling and I was weary from having to up keep, fix up and clean it constantly. I would say Heavenly Father “PLEASE…I can’t do this much longer.” Then he would say: “not yet.” Then he would bouy me up and help me to keep going.
One summer day, we volunteered to watch a puppy for a friend for a few hours one day. I walked with the children and the puppy to a local park and we played there for a couple of hours. When it was time to walk back home, I loaded the youngest two in the double stroller and the dog was resistant to come because she was hot and tired. I picked her up and put her on my 3 year old son’s lap. He held her happily. As we were heading up a big hill the dog suddenly jumped off my son’s lap and landed too close to the front wheel and hurt her leg. She yelped and limped away. I was so worried that the puppy’s leg had been badly injured. I scooped her up and put her back on my son’s lap. My oldest son said “Mom, I know what we should do…we should say a prayer for Heavenly Father to heal the puppy’s leg.” I said “that is a great idea!” He prayed for the puppy and as soon as we reached the top of the hill the puppy jumped down and was just fine. My oldest son smiled and said “Heavenly Father healed the dog! Now we need to say a prayer to thank him.” I said “that is a great idea let’s do that!” As we finished the prayer and rounded the corner to go home my oldest son said “Mom Heavenly Father really can do anything!” I said “yes he can…he can do all things.” Here was my 9 year old son demonstrating such great faith. Where was my faith that our lives were being properly cared for by that same Father that “could do all things”?
In September, our orders and paperwork were finally approved to travel. Things started falling into place almost faster than I was prepared for. We had tickets to fly to Alaska the last day in September and though our house did not sell we were able to find good renters. About 10 days after arriving to Alaska, my Husband returned from his deployment, our household goods arrived the next morning and he was home to help unpack and get settled in. As I look back I am so grateful for how things worked out. Sometimes we think that if things don’t work out the way we want, that we are doing something wrong, that maybe the Lord doesn’t love as much as one of his other children. In this case I learned that it is all about timing. He has a plan for each of us. He knows our needs. He hears and answers our prayers. We need to have faith and trust that he ever mindful of us and our needs. We also need to remain faithful to him to be worthy to receive the blessings he has in store for us as we pass through the trials that are put before us. I am grateful for my trials and for the things I learn from them. I am thankful for the Lord’s timing.
Stacy, I'm so glad you shared this! wonderful timing, too. Ben had to go to Utah for the weekend to pick up a car. So I got to take the kids to church by myself today, I was doing Sharing Time and had to hold a wiggly Maisie during it to keep her from crying.
ReplyDeleteIt wasn't bad because I knew Ben would be back by tonight. But to not know when he was coming back (or if) and to have to haul the kids to church each week alone...that would be really tough. (Not to mention a million other reasons it would suck to be a single parent).
I have always admired you for having done this multiple times. It has made me sad to think of how hard it has been on you...But I can see that all these trials have strengthened you beyond what you probably thought possible. Trials of faith can help us realize our true potential, when we let them.
Thanks so much for your example and for sharing the stories of answered prayers. They made me cry.
Love you, Stace!